Why We Like Handwritten Notes (and what that has to do with Performance Culture)
(First appeared in WRAL TechWire.)
Hands up if a handwritten note makes your heart grow three sizes. Yep… me too!
Let's think about this for a minute. Why, with all the digital options available, does a handwritten note move us so much?
Because it takes heart. Seeing a person’s handwriting touches us and makes us feel connected. We see the writing slant a little down the page. We chuckle when a word is misspelled or crossed out. We love it because it’s authentic.
And aren’t we all craving more of that these days? Authentic moments. Unfiltered moments. Imperfect moments.
This is where I’m going to ask you to take a leap with me to see how authenticity is the opposite end of the spectrum from performance culture-driven perfectionism.
You see, we’ve been flooded by this desire to seem flawless for about three decades now. Remember the rail thin models of the ‘80s and ‘90s? Then came the sterile email communications and perfect presentations of the early 2000s. Today, we’re in the world of filtered photos and picture-perfect social media influencers. If you can show me how to apply my makeup perfectly, wear a waist trainer or launch a course on watercolor art in three days, you can become a TikTok or Instagram sensation.
Now, I admire a perfectly organized closet as much as anybody, but really… deep down… don’t we all need a little room to breathe and skip color coding our wardrobe?
I can tell you this much: the people trying to live for performance culture often end up in my coaching sessions. They are burned out. Fried to a crisp.
The good news is that in the last couple of months it appears that the pendulum is swinging back a bit. We are seeing social media influencers say NO to the filter, and YES to who they really are. These are the influencers who embrace the homemade and value the imperfect. Thick bodies, crazy hair, messy kitchen… bring it on! They are high performers who are thriving despite performance culture.
Healthy high performers excel in one or two areas because they take the time and energy to invest in themselves and real skills. They give themselves grace in other areas, and don’t get their value from being perfect in every way. As a result, they are inspired, optimistic and overall refreshed. They have the margin to operate from a place of rest.
Take a moment to ask yourself:
Where are you on the pendulum? Are you exhausted because you’re driven by performance culture, or are you present and able to find joy in your work and the people around you?
Do you take yourself and others so seriously that you don’t remember the last time you belly laughed? Or do you find a sense of delight in the silly and uncurated moments?
If life were to get 10% better for you tomorrow, how would you recognize it as “better?” What would be different? How would you feel?
What performance-driven part of your life can you let go of? If that part was gone, what would you love to do or explore instead?
This is the good stuff. These questions are more than a notion and have the potential to change everything! So, if you think you’ve become a performance culture addict, stop and take stock. Or better yet sit down, grab a pen and reconnect to the perfectly imperfect you!
